Nod Your Head And Tell Me

AUGUST 18

Hola, it’s Tuesday morning, very early morning, to be exact. Just turned Tuesday, in fact. So today’s my cousin’s 16th birthday. We’re rented a boat on the river for today, and we’ll be spending pretty much all day there. You know, I remember my cousin when she was six years old…. It’s quite odd to think that she’ll be turning sixteen. God, I can barely wrap my head around it!
Anyways, I’m writing my new story right now, and have half a page until I get to thirty pages! I’m so excited! It means I can actually finish this one, whenever it does end. I decided to post an excerpt I wrote in the last half hour, which I find very amusing (the writing, not how much time it’s been a part of my story). I should probably tune everyone in to what’s happening in the story, but I really hate summaries and synopsizes.
Actually, I’ve had to start writing my own language for this story. You don’t see any of it in this excerpt, but I worked hard on the language. So far the only words I have are ones that have been used, which isn’t many. But I also have two pages of grammar rules (sentence structure, gender of nouns, conjugations, forming a question, possessive noun rules, pronunciation, and origins of the words). I actually got the inspiration for writing a new language from J.R.R. Tolkien, inarguably the best writer that has ever lived. I’ve long been fascinated by the fact that he wrote the Elvish language, and how it is an actual language. God, that’s so amazing. Of course, mine will inevitably pale in comparison, but I do need it for writing purposes and to make sure that my writing is consistent in its entirety. I’m well aware that no one will understand the language, but for my own purposes, I would like to set parameters so that my writing in this other language does not become erratic and inconsistent. In other news, I’ve also finally finished the final copy of the map. Again, I’m perfectly f*cking aware that it is not required for understanding my writing, but it helps me. I’m starting to think that I spend more time on the map and on Ahnan than I do actually writing…. I’ll post a picture of the map eventually (since I want to make myself feel like I did something worthwhile).
Okay, short recap: Mari is an apprentice to Syx, a mage. She is at his home to get books that he requires her to read. Syx is only five years older than her, just in case you were wondering. While I would love for the two of them to fall in love with each other, it seems excessively alike The Immortals series…where Daine falls in love with her teacher (a mage) and ditto for said mage. Now, I do have another possible suitor for Mari, but I’ll keep that hush-hush for now. It’s very scandalous (no, no one in her family. That’s impossible, but more on that later), if I do say so myself. I mean, an age difference off seven or eight years is accepted…I think. Let me consult with my assistant.
Yes, Jessica has declared that it is acceptable. Anyone wishing to protest Jessica’s verdict should phone in through my other assistant, Gordon. He’s a golden retriever; lovable, but dim. He’s a rescue so I haven’t the heart to fire him. Thus I hired Jessica as my second assistant.
Okay, Alanna’s way too tired and should go to bed now, but is in that sort of high you get when you’re astoundingly tired. She’s talking about her assistants (whom she doesn’t have) and apparently one is a golden retriever, who are not dim in the slightest. Alanna is also talking in third person, which may hint at a psychological problem. Oh, look, Alanna’s going to diagnose herself with a mental problem! Hooray!
Yeah, I was up ‘till about three yesterday reading. Of course, I woke up at ten thirty, which amounts to about seven and a half hours of sleep. But since I will be woken up at seven (which is in six hours and twenty-seven minutes from now), I should probably be getting to bed. After I finish my book. This should take about an hour and a half…so that’s about two-ish for bedtime.
Look at me, extending this post to three pages (I'm typing on Word on account that my internet shut off) like I’ve got all the time in the world. Alright, here you go:

“You’re such a lady,” I commented, running a finger against the length of the teacup’s handle.
“How so?” Syx asked indignantly.
“Well, there’s the fine china, the artwork that depicts flowers, the silver candlestick holders, the jewelry, and your obsession over you image, to name a few.”
“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.” The mage turned away, stowing the kettle in a cabinet.
“Please, Syx. I notice more than most people do. Hyper-aware, I believe I’ve been called.” I brushed a strand of hair behind my ear. “Of course I’m not saying that you’re homosexual-” – he winced at the word – “-but it’s simply amusing to see a twenty-year old male mage who wears more jewelry than a lady.” Syx sat down, pursing his lips, though his eyes smiled.
“Coming from a lower citywoman who looks like a noble, I’m not going to dignify that with a response,” he sniffed.
“You know, I’m so glad I’m not a noble. Gods, I can barely breathe!” I exclaimed, fingering the dress.
“You could take that off, if you wanted,” Syx told me. I gave him a shocked look, and he reddened. “I didn’t mean it like that!”
“Sure you didn’t.” I sipped my tea.
“Mari! I just meant that I could get something for you to wear-”
“-Your clothes are too big-”
“Do you forget that I’m a mage?!”
“Not at all, Mr. Most-Powerful-Mage-In-The-World,” I snorted. Syx glared at me for a moment before angrily drinking his tea. “I’m kidding, Syx.”
“Good,” he replied shortly.
“Come on, smile,” I wheedled. He fought to keep his frown. I stood up and stepped behind his chair, positioning my lips beside his ear. “Smile, Maxwell Strima,” I whispered. He turned and looked at me, staring deep into my eyes. So deep, in fact, that I felt as if he could read my thoughts, that he could see my soul.
I turned away quickly.
“So, I should probably get going,” I said loudly. “Thanks for the books, by the way. They’re…pretty.”
“Pretty?” The mage raised one eyebrow, amused.
“Yeah. And um, the meeting with the king was nice. He’s different than I expected.” I collected up the books. “And thanks…for the tea. Mm, wonderful! Never had such good tea in my life, to be honest.”
“Mari,” he said patiently.
“Oh, and should I mention that your house is lovely! Absolutely lovely!” I backed up, heading for the door. “I suppose I should like to know the name of your decorator-” I caught my foot on a small table, and tumbled backwards, landing flat on my back.
“Oh, shit!” Syx was helping me up in an instant. “Gods, Mari, be careful! You know that doors don’t just magically guide you through them, right?” He smiled, handing me a book.
“Yes, I do,” I snatched the book from his hand. “You just distracted me.”
“Right. So it had nothing to do with my decorator?” He laughed.
“Glad you find me so amusing,” I huffed, readjusting my hold on the volumes. “It’s wonderful to know that you’ll have a walking comedy around you for the next few years.”
“Better than a walking corpse,” he pointed out brightly. I glowered at him. “Although I suppose you could manage that, in time.” I froze.
“What…like, raise the dead?”
“I don’t know how powerful you’ll be, Mari. But if you wanted to, I think you could, eventually.” I blinked several times. This was something new to ponder.

I've been an emotional wreck for the past few days, and practically anything will set me off, whether it be on a crying fit or a screaming fit. I'm just so sick of everything. I'm about one annoying comment away from shoving my brother onto the highway, and can think of nothing better than starting school. Honestly? Am I really so pathetic? I honestly think that because I write so much is one of the reasons that my depression's gone away. It's like I'm making an escape to a different place, where things are different. I can get caught up in my own little world and get away from everything around me. Sanctuary? Hm, perhaps.

Peace